oped: ROFL... right Charlie you have a big voice alright...albeit it is fueled by alcohol and drugs and a lack of formal education...calling the proverbial kettle black are we? Please do yourself a favor and stick with comedy as you definetly lack in the essayist ,counseling and diatribe arena!
By Jethro Nededog
Charlie Sheen is giving voice to the voice-less in a raging Twitter rant addressing “Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson, who’s in the middle of a controversy over anti-gay and racial comments made during an interview with GQ magazine.
No stranger to being in the middle of a media firestorm himself, Sheen shows no mercy for Robertson in a very angry missive posted to Twitter on Saturday.
“You have offended and hurt so many dear friends of mine, who DO NOT have the voice or the outreach that I do,” FX’s “Anger Management” star said. “Well, news flash shower-dodger, I will speak loudly and clearly for ALL of them.”
Also read: ‘Duck Dynasty’ Star Thanks Fans for ‘Support’: ‘We’ve Had Kind of a Crazy Week’
In speaking for those who are offended by Robertson’s statements, Sheen refers to the reality star as “mallard brained” and “desperately sub evolved,” among other incendiary things.
He also threatens ”a MaSheen style media beat down” as he insults Robertson’s intelligence and offers some interesting thoughts on the kind of work Robertson can get after “Duck Dynasty.”
As fans of the A&E show already know, Robertson has other avenues in which to make a living outside of reality TV. His patented duck call is at the center of his multi-million dollar company, Duck Commander.
Also read: ‘Duck Dynasty’ Christmas Album Poised for Sales Boost Amid Homophobic, Racist Controversy
Currently, A&E has suspended Robertson from shooting the series indefinitely — a move that will have very little effect on the upcoming fifth season premiering on Jan. 15. Nine out of the 10 episodes have already been shot and the production is currently on production hiatus.
Read Sheen’s entire message to Robertson below:
hey Mallard brained
you have offended and hurt so many dear friends of mine,
who DO NOT have the voice or the outreach that I do.
well news flash
I will speak loudly and clearly for ALL of them.
just when your desperately sub evolved ass thought the pressure was off,
you are now in the crosshairs of a MaSheen style media
(I’ll try to keep the big words to a minimum as not to confuse you)
your statements were and are
the idea that you have a job
outside of dirt-clod stacking
is a miracle.
the only ‘Dynasty’ you are attached to might be the
re-runs of that dated show.
the only thing you should ever be in charge of building is a hole in the ground the exact size of your head.
perhaps your beard would fit as well if you plucked out the
army of scabies and
bull weevils sequestered deep in it’s sarcophagus of dander and weasel pelts.
shame on you.
you’re the only surviving
brain donor I’ve ever known.
when the gators and Egrets
kick you out of their
you need to make serious amends to those you have
on the eight day
when I was whittling my cosmic banjo,
I’m pretty sure YOU were the scattered dross I then used to light a fire and
locate the nearest
repulsed by you;
Duck; that was me.